It seems like every year, the holiday season starts earlier and earlier. Christmas decorations are on the shelves months in advance—long before we’ve even had a chance to enjoy the holidays that come before it. Many people jump right into shopping, determined to get ahead of the rush. But in all the hustle, it’s easy to forget what the holidays are really about.
The heart of the holidays isn’t found in the piles of wrapped boxes under the tree. It’s found in connection, kindness, and shared moments. But somewhere along the way, gift-giving can turn from something joyful into something that feels more like a duty.
Some people shop to show love or appreciation. Others buy because it’s expected—“I have to get something for my brother-in-law,” even if the relationship is complicated. That sense of obligation can quietly drain the joy right out of the season.
Even when we’re buying for people we love, we don’t always choose gifts for them—we often choose gifts for the version of them we imagine. Maybe you pick out a bright sweater because you think they’d look great in it, even though they usually prefer soft neutrals. They smile politely and say “thank you,” even if it’s not quite their style. It’s a small thing, but it’s also a reminder: gift-giving is about the recipient, not the giver.
Once a gift is given, it belongs fully to that person. If they decide to exchange it, regift it, or pass it along, that’s okay. The act of giving is the gift itself.
And sometimes, the most meaningful presents are the simplest. There’s no need to overwhelm someone with multiple gifts or spend more than they can comfortably reciprocate. Thoughtfulness matters far more than price.
Consider giving gifts that are meant to be enjoyed, not stored away:
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A basket of favorite snacks or specialty foods they might not splurge on for themselves.
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Tickets to a movie, concert, or play to create a shared experience.
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A gift card to a restaurant they’ve always wanted to try.
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A homemade meal or freezer-friendly dish for busy parents or older adults who might appreciate an easy, comforting dinner on a hectic day.
These kinds of gifts don’t take up space, don’t require dusting, and often mean far more than a random item purchased out of obligation.
This holiday season, try taking the pressure off yourself. Focus less on stuff and more on connection. The best gifts are the ones that make people feel seen, valued, and loved—not the ones that come in the biggest box or fanciest wrapping paper.
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